Monday, May 13, 2013

Winded

Sorry that it's been a while since I've posted. Sorrier still that the post I finally wrote is a total downer. Keepin it real folks, keepin it real. lol.

Well, I made it through Mother's Day by the skin of my teeth. Leading up to Sunday I set it in my mind that it was going to be a positive day, because I am a daughter and I have an incredible mom and mother in law to celebrate with. It was not going to be about me and my lack of motherhood. But it was no use. A few reminders throughout the day, and I was a hot mess. Still kind of am. Maybe next year I'll actually be happy and won't have to grit through it...

I might not have any physical strength whatsoever. lol. But I've always tried to push myself to be strong inside and have the heart of a fighter. Getting back up and trying again, blow after blow after blow. But I have to be honest guys - I feel winded. I'm so tired of this continued heartache and waiting. I had a tearful prayer time this morning, just asking God to remember me as He remembered Rebekah (Gen. 25:21), Rachel (Gen. 30:22), Hannah (1 Sam. 1:19-20), and Elizabeth (Luke 1:12). But even more than that, I asked Him to give me endurance. I know that I am in a particularly discouraged season right now, and forgive me if I sound dramatic, but I just don't know how much more of this I can take. I need the Lord's sustaining grace. And a vacation. And apparently a Snuggie, because these people seem pretty happy and content with life-


lol. Sorry, I just had to throw a little comic relief in there. ;) Thanks in advance for any prayers coming our way. God is good, and He is going to see us through. <3

8 comments:

  1. You and Ryan are always in my thoughts <3

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  2. You were certainly not alone yesterday in your pain. Hoping the end of the pain comes very soon for you!

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  3. Praying:) this is a hard hard hard journey, and you ARE a fighter! You are so strong and have the faith to keep asking God to provide, even after much discouragement. Praying that soon his answer is YES!!♥
    Alyssa

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  4. Hey sweetie, praying for you and Ryan. It will happen for the both of you. You both are in and have been in our prayer's. Keep up the laughs and smiles. You are a strong woman and I'm glad you were able to make it through the day. You give out so much inspiration. Always in our thought's and prayer's The Coley Family (Elena,Jason,Savannah)

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  5. Yesterday was a difficult day for me too, thinking of you and many other women who are going through similar things gave me strengh and courage to keep hoping and waiting for God's perfect time, know that you are not alone. Praying for you!

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  6. Mother's Day has been a tough one for me, too, in the past 4 years. I broke down yesterday in church when the speaker was praying for women who long to be mothers, because I've been there. For far too long. Prayers coming your way.

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  7. We love you and continue to pray with you, that God would grant your desire for a child! Thank you for keepin it real <3

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