Wednesday, October 31, 2012

The New Phase

Now that we're approved, we've hit a new phase in our wait for Baby Miller. Many in the adoption world refer to it as being "Paper Pregnant." It really is just a matter of time before an expectant mother picks us, and we bring a baby home. :) Many of you have asked about how long this will take, and we really don't know. It depends on the potential birthmoms that are currently working with the agency, and what their criteria is for an adoptive couple. We were told that the couple that has been waiting the longest at our agency, has been waiting for a year. However, it could be up to two years, or it could happen next week! We just don't know.

I originally thought that this ambiguous waiting period would be incredibly difficult, but I don't think it will be that bad after all (although I reserve my right to change my mind and have a melt down at any given moment!). I still have a lot to do, learn, and prepare for. But these are things that I WANT to do, and that I find much more enjoyable than the paperwork and homestudy requirements. Below are the items on my new to-do list so you have an idea of what I'm working on now. :)
  • Find a pediatrician
  • Figure out benefits and steps needed to get baby on our insurance
  • Figure out how social security is handled for an adopted child
  • Read a few books regarding getting the baby on a sleeping/eating schedule, what to expect the first year, and parenting
  • Make crib bedding
  • Work on other nursery projects like making over an old glider chair, making a valance for the closet, and hanging up decorations
  • Take an infant care class with Ryan
  • Learn about all of the hootie falootie baby gadgets that are out there nowadays
  • Get more detailed information on my options for breastfeeding. This may be a shocker to some of you, but yes, breastfeeding is possible even though I am not pregnant. :) More to come on this topic soon!

Friday, October 26, 2012


WE'RE APPROVED!! Our homestudy is complete and we are officially approved as adoptive parents!

The final interview this morning was longer than I thought it would be. It took a little over three hours. My only regret was that I didn't eat breakfast before she came. haha. I honestly can't even remember at this point all the things we talked about, but some of the topics included our book reading, expectations of the relationship with the birthmom, what we anticipate our parenting style being like, how we plan on handling attention and intrusive commentary/questions from strangers who are uneducated about adoption, what changes and challenges we expect to have the hardest time adjusting to, etc. Lots of good conversation. It felt a bit more like a counseling session than an interview in some ways. She was really just trying to gauge where we are at, and gave us some advice throughout our time together based on her years of experience in adoption. We did a walk through of the house, which was very low key. And that was it!  It was actually a really nice time. 

Now we wait. :) Our profile book will be shown to birthmothers who are about 7 months along in their pregnancy. In a typical situation, we will get a call if/when one of them decides they would like to meet us.  We would have the time before the birth to get to know her and start developing a relationship. However, it's also possible to get a phone call about a "surprise baby". This is when the birthmother chooses us while she's in the hospital delivering the baby, or perhaps is already in postpartum recovery and painfully realizes that she is unable to parent the baby in her current circumstances. There are so many different scenarios that could play out. It will definitely be interesting to see how our story unfolds from here. :)

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Fully Funded

I have not talked much, if at all, about the financial aspect of adoption. But we just hit a big milestone, and I can't help but share it with you. :) Tonight we made the final transfer into our savings account to complete the total funds necessary for the adoption. We are officially, 100% funded. eeeeeeeee! :) Thank You Lord!!!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Nesting :)

We have not been officially approved as adoptive parents yet. birthday was earlier this month and I couldn't think of anything that I wanted more than stuff for the baby. :) With my homestudy to-do list complete, I am in total nesting mode! I did some prep work on the nursery this past week and Ryan and I were able to add some key items to it yesterday. :) 

Our crib! Straight edges, clean cut, and most importantly - Denay sized! ;) I am 5'1, so...shorter than most. :) Some of the cribs I've seen come up to my chest, which is just not practical for laying down and picking up a baby multiple times a day. This Ikea Sundvik crib hits just above my hips, and the shorter stature really works well in the small room, so it's perfect for us on multiple levels. :)

Next, we set up the dresser, which is also from Ikea because you just can't beat their prices for new furniture. I took the closet doors down and painted the inside so that I could add space to the room. I'm going to be working on a valance for the top part to make it less closet-y. I plan on putting a changing pad on the dresser to give it a dual purpose. And I'll add storage bins of some kind to the right of it. 

It also happened to be a good weekend for getting free stuff! lol. I was very blessed to add a pack n play, shoes, diapers, and various other items to my growing collection of baby stuff. My awesome sister in law even passed on the beloved "Current Family Favorite" t-shirt. :) It's so nice to have friends who lovingly hand their goodies off to me. It really makes me feel like a mommy-to-be. :)

Monday, October 8, 2012

Almost done!

Ryan and I have both finished our second books! :) One of the chapters that stood out to me dealt with what typically happens before, during, and after the birth of the child. There was a ton of information, but my bottom line take-away was that I need to put others before myself. The delivery and birth are going to be about the birthmom and the baby, not me. I admit, I was a little overwhelmed and even sad as I was reading through all of the typical emotions, and possible scenarios that could play out at the hospital. What if the birth family is not supportive of her decision and they make things difficult at the hospital? How can we rejoice, when she is being struck with grief? What if she chooses not to sign the papers after she sees the baby? What if we don't get to walk away as parents???

Ay ay ay, So many things to trust the Lord about! But God is good, and I know that He will give us the grace and wisdom to get through that part in our journey, however difficult it may be. :)

On top of finishing our books last week, we also got our profile books in, and Ryan had his individual interview. So this is what we have left before approval-
  • Ryan's third book
  • Denay's third book
  • Physical exams and bloodwork, which is scheduled for next Monday
  • Final interview. I sent an email out to Anita this morning to see if we could do October 26, so hopefully that works for her.
We're getting so close! :)